Today in class, we talked about rape and it's stats. That's some terrifying stuff.. Not even kidding. That being said, I don't feel like it's fair that I have to go throughout my life being paranoid of getting raped or, god forbid, murdered.
Why is our culture so accepting of this and want to point the finger at the victim? Why?
It's not fair to anyone. As a woman, I should be able to wear what I want and do as I please, but I can't. I can't wear anything "too revealing" in fear someone will decide to take advantage. I don't go to parties because I don't want to get drunk around people I don't know. I can't walk alone too late at night in case there is someone lurking in the shadows to cause me harm. (Although, you are JUST as likely to get raped at anytime during the day as well as late night/early morning.) I carry mace with me everywhere I go as a just in case precaution. I have to be aware of my surroundings at ALL times since there is no telling who will do what to me.
This is slightly ridiculous and not fair. I shouldn't fear anyone or anything. I shouldn't be so paranoid, but I am. Sure, there are some sick people in the world, and chances of me meeting them are kind of slim, but god forbid I do and I'm not prepared for it. God forbid, I get drunk at a party and can't consent to sex. I WILL get blamed. Yes there are people out there who don't victim blame and I want to thank them ALL personally. It's a beautiful thing when people stop blaming the victim when 9 times out of 10 it is NOT their fault. Not in the slightest.
I don't know. There's something wrong with us as a society if we victim blame. It's disgusting, and we should really start to evaluate things.
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
I don't usually touch on politics, but...
I think it should be pretty obvious that I take a very liberal stance on things. I believe in rights for all human beings. All of them. I believe in pro-choice because while I may never intend to get an abortion, I should have a fucking right to get one if I so damn well please. It's not the governments right to tell someone who they should love, or that they should carry an unwanted baby to full term. There are loads of kids in need of homes who are orphans. Loads.
That being said, I really wish the government would stay the hell out of MY vagina. It is by default, my property, and I don't appreciate them telling me what I can and cannot do with it. That would be like me telling them what to do with their penises. I mean, seriously?
They also don't have a right to take away my birth control or planned parenthood. I'm on the pill. It's expensive. I would quite like it if my insurance paid for it. I have several medications that I have to pay for, and thank goodness I have a mother who can help me out when need be otherwise I would kind of owe my soul to the pharmaceutical companies. Most women don't have that luxury. Also, being sexual active I've bought my fair share of condoms, and those are even more expensive then my birth control pills. I've been on birth control since I was 16. I didn't use it for contraception in the first place. I needed it for medical reasons.
I would really just appreciate it if people took their religious views out of the government rulings and the like. While I may not believe in god, if I did, I feel like he would be so ashamed of how the government is treating their own fellow beings. Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't Christians/whatever religion you choose basically supposed to treat one another better? Aren't they supposed to love one another and not treat another human being like shit?
We're all humans, and we're all different. That's what makes the human species so beautiful. We all have different beliefs and fall in love differently and live our lives differently. I'm sorry but I think god would want us to love one another and not attempt to chastise anyone for who they loved and he definitely wouldn't take away anyone's rights as a human being. I'm just sayin'.
That being said, I really wish the government would stay the hell out of MY vagina. It is by default, my property, and I don't appreciate them telling me what I can and cannot do with it. That would be like me telling them what to do with their penises. I mean, seriously?
They also don't have a right to take away my birth control or planned parenthood. I'm on the pill. It's expensive. I would quite like it if my insurance paid for it. I have several medications that I have to pay for, and thank goodness I have a mother who can help me out when need be otherwise I would kind of owe my soul to the pharmaceutical companies. Most women don't have that luxury. Also, being sexual active I've bought my fair share of condoms, and those are even more expensive then my birth control pills. I've been on birth control since I was 16. I didn't use it for contraception in the first place. I needed it for medical reasons.
I would really just appreciate it if people took their religious views out of the government rulings and the like. While I may not believe in god, if I did, I feel like he would be so ashamed of how the government is treating their own fellow beings. Correct me if I'm wrong, but aren't Christians/whatever religion you choose basically supposed to treat one another better? Aren't they supposed to love one another and not treat another human being like shit?
We're all humans, and we're all different. That's what makes the human species so beautiful. We all have different beliefs and fall in love differently and live our lives differently. I'm sorry but I think god would want us to love one another and not attempt to chastise anyone for who they loved and he definitely wouldn't take away anyone's rights as a human being. I'm just sayin'.
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Horror Movies Sexist?
Here's some important things you should probably know about me.
1) I'm a vegan.
2) I'm a feminist.
3) I reallllllllllllllllly love me some horror movies.
That being said, I don't think horror movies are sexist. Sure, we get to some naked chicks getting murdered, but hey, I love tits as much as the next person (I know, I'm not sure how I'm single either) and I think we should all just embrace the fact that there's a lot of sex, naked people, and some awesome ass gore in horror movies.
I know some of them are a little over the top, but that's okay. If you don't like them, don't watch them. This applies to anything. If you don't like (insert whatever thing you hate), then don't associate with it. Seriously. It's as easy as that. It really is. I promise.
I was raised on horror movies, and aside from you know, rooting for the killer or whatever, I turned out alright. I don't accept the murder of animals, I want nothing more than for all of humans to have the same rights because we are simply human, and I'm pretty dang good at the whole school thing. Honestly, I think I'd be pretty boring if my mom hadn't taken the chance and raised me on horror. She, of course, watched the movies before I did to make sure there wasn't any overt sex or nudity, and if there was I either wasn't allowed to watch it, or she just fast forwarded through them. (oh, how I miss VHS's.)
All of that being said, she was a pretty damn good parent. She pushed me to my limits grade wise, and she raised me to not be so judgmental of others. That's the problem with parent's nowadays, they don't really parent and then they get up in a tizzy because their child has made a bad grade, or they watched a movie that was inappropriate for them. Once that's happened, it's never their fault, it's always someone else's. It's a little ridiculous.
Anyway, I got off on a tangent there. Obviously being a feminist I should probably think that horror movies exploit women and all of that stuff, but I just can't bring myself to look at it that way. I really can't. Blame it on my love of horror movies, I'm okay with that, but I will always be the first to say that horror movies aren't sexist. Sorry.
1) I'm a vegan.
2) I'm a feminist.
3) I reallllllllllllllllly love me some horror movies.
That being said, I don't think horror movies are sexist. Sure, we get to some naked chicks getting murdered, but hey, I love tits as much as the next person (I know, I'm not sure how I'm single either) and I think we should all just embrace the fact that there's a lot of sex, naked people, and some awesome ass gore in horror movies.
I know some of them are a little over the top, but that's okay. If you don't like them, don't watch them. This applies to anything. If you don't like (insert whatever thing you hate), then don't associate with it. Seriously. It's as easy as that. It really is. I promise.
I was raised on horror movies, and aside from you know, rooting for the killer or whatever, I turned out alright. I don't accept the murder of animals, I want nothing more than for all of humans to have the same rights because we are simply human, and I'm pretty dang good at the whole school thing. Honestly, I think I'd be pretty boring if my mom hadn't taken the chance and raised me on horror. She, of course, watched the movies before I did to make sure there wasn't any overt sex or nudity, and if there was I either wasn't allowed to watch it, or she just fast forwarded through them. (oh, how I miss VHS's.)
All of that being said, she was a pretty damn good parent. She pushed me to my limits grade wise, and she raised me to not be so judgmental of others. That's the problem with parent's nowadays, they don't really parent and then they get up in a tizzy because their child has made a bad grade, or they watched a movie that was inappropriate for them. Once that's happened, it's never their fault, it's always someone else's. It's a little ridiculous.
Anyway, I got off on a tangent there. Obviously being a feminist I should probably think that horror movies exploit women and all of that stuff, but I just can't bring myself to look at it that way. I really can't. Blame it on my love of horror movies, I'm okay with that, but I will always be the first to say that horror movies aren't sexist. Sorry.
Thursday, February 16, 2012
Being in the south means be called ma'am, deal with it.
About a week ago in my woman's psych class, (I know, I know, I hear you complaining already) we were discussing how here in the south waitresses/waiters are likely to call you ma'am, sugar, baby, honey, hon, etc. Personally, I see nothing wrong with this considering we ARE in the south and if you were born/raised here you learn to say ma'am/sir and the sweet talk just kind of comes with that territory.
I call people for my current job and 99.9% of the time we're calling other people in Texas. That being said, I get called ma'am, A LOT. It used to bother me until I brought it up to my mom who said, "Danielle, seriously? They're just being polite.", then I realized that we kind of are in the south and I was raised the exact same way.
Even if I don't live in the south when I'm older, have my children, etc, etc, I'll be teaching them to say yes ma'am/no ma'am, yes sir/no sir cause it's just polite. It's definitely a whole 'nother world to go somewhere and not be called ma'am or not to even use it. Not using it is kind of a joke, I don't think I've ever, you know, not intentionally not said it.
Anyway, back to what I was saying, if you're in the south you kind of have to get used to it. People are going to call you sweet names. It happens. I know I'd rather be called ma'am to miss any day.
P.S. if this blog post doesn't make much sense, blame it on my sickness. I'm currently laying in bed where I have been all day with the exception of taking a test that I didn't study for. I hate feeling sickly. :( Please send good vibes my way you lovely, lovely people.
I call people for my current job and 99.9% of the time we're calling other people in Texas. That being said, I get called ma'am, A LOT. It used to bother me until I brought it up to my mom who said, "Danielle, seriously? They're just being polite.", then I realized that we kind of are in the south and I was raised the exact same way.
Even if I don't live in the south when I'm older, have my children, etc, etc, I'll be teaching them to say yes ma'am/no ma'am, yes sir/no sir cause it's just polite. It's definitely a whole 'nother world to go somewhere and not be called ma'am or not to even use it. Not using it is kind of a joke, I don't think I've ever, you know, not intentionally not said it.
Anyway, back to what I was saying, if you're in the south you kind of have to get used to it. People are going to call you sweet names. It happens. I know I'd rather be called ma'am to miss any day.
P.S. if this blog post doesn't make much sense, blame it on my sickness. I'm currently laying in bed where I have been all day with the exception of taking a test that I didn't study for. I hate feeling sickly. :( Please send good vibes my way you lovely, lovely people.
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Why does everyone assume I need to be in a relationship to be happy?
With it being Valentine's Day, I feel the need to address this. It's been getting on my nerves for a while, and I would just really appreciate it if everyone would see where I was coming from.
Since the boyfriend and I broke up, I don't necessarily see the point of me ever being in a major, serious relationship. I used to have to be with someone to be happy. I couldn't make myself happy and I would just go from relationship to relationship. This was especially true in high school, and I know I hurt some of you out there, and I'm sorry. I was just always looking for something better.
When I was 17 I suddenly found that everyone I was interested in just didn't want anything serious with me. It was the same story every time. We would be in the talking stages, you know, getting to know one another when all of a sudden I was dropped like a hot potato. Cue the trust problems and daddy issues, folks!
That all being said, this happened for three years. That was plenty of time for me to focus on making myself happy, doing whatever I wanted, and just being the beautiful, strong, independent lady that I am. Then, le boyfriend happened, and it's kind of amazing how quickly I reverted to depending on him for my happiness. So you can kind of just imagine how bloody upset I was when he decided we shouldn't be together anymore. Yeah, independent Danielle had just kind of left the building for about 5 months, and I reallllllly needed her to come back.
She DID come back after I decided to go vegan, rearranged ALL of my furniture in my apartment alone, and just realised that I was about a million times better off. As I said in my first blog post, I'm not bitter, the ex and I are still really close, like, we talk more than we did when we were together.
Anyway, this is all beside the point I want to make. I, personally, am much happier outside of a relationship where I don't depend on anyone to make me happy. That being said, I don't see myself getting married, in fact, I don't really want to get married; I just want a really damn pretty ring (which I can provide for myself one day), and to be able to wear a pretty dress and have everyone stare at me (haha). Seriously though, every time I bring this up to someone they ALL say, "Oh, you'll find someone, one day. Don't give up now, you're too young."
Ex-fucking-scuse me.
I'm "giving up" because I don't want to spend the rest of my life with someone? I'm "too young" to make this kind of life altering decision? I make life altering decisions every single day. I'm not "giving up", I'm deciding that I'm better than losing my independence and happiness to be with someone. I'll find someone? I'M NOT LOOKING FOR ANYONE!
I much prefer to live alone, pay my own bills, and support myself. As to having children? That's going happen when I can financially and emotionally support another living human being that will be dependent on me for at least 18 years of its life. I don't need a significant other to have or raise a baby. I can do that on my own when I'm good a ready to.
Me choosing to be single for the rest of my life more than most likely doesn't mean I'm giving up, or that I'm too cynical. I just don't want to be with anyone. I would much rather you ALL support my decision instead of telling me that I'll find someone. That makes me mad and makes me think that you think too less of me to be able to live my life alone and independently.
Okay, I'm off my soapbox I think. I hope everyone has a good Valentine's Day, even though I don't really think this should be a holiday. Love everyone everyday, not just one day a year.
Since the boyfriend and I broke up, I don't necessarily see the point of me ever being in a major, serious relationship. I used to have to be with someone to be happy. I couldn't make myself happy and I would just go from relationship to relationship. This was especially true in high school, and I know I hurt some of you out there, and I'm sorry. I was just always looking for something better.
When I was 17 I suddenly found that everyone I was interested in just didn't want anything serious with me. It was the same story every time. We would be in the talking stages, you know, getting to know one another when all of a sudden I was dropped like a hot potato. Cue the trust problems and daddy issues, folks!
That all being said, this happened for three years. That was plenty of time for me to focus on making myself happy, doing whatever I wanted, and just being the beautiful, strong, independent lady that I am. Then, le boyfriend happened, and it's kind of amazing how quickly I reverted to depending on him for my happiness. So you can kind of just imagine how bloody upset I was when he decided we shouldn't be together anymore. Yeah, independent Danielle had just kind of left the building for about 5 months, and I reallllllly needed her to come back.
She DID come back after I decided to go vegan, rearranged ALL of my furniture in my apartment alone, and just realised that I was about a million times better off. As I said in my first blog post, I'm not bitter, the ex and I are still really close, like, we talk more than we did when we were together.
Anyway, this is all beside the point I want to make. I, personally, am much happier outside of a relationship where I don't depend on anyone to make me happy. That being said, I don't see myself getting married, in fact, I don't really want to get married; I just want a really damn pretty ring (which I can provide for myself one day), and to be able to wear a pretty dress and have everyone stare at me (haha). Seriously though, every time I bring this up to someone they ALL say, "Oh, you'll find someone, one day. Don't give up now, you're too young."
Ex-fucking-scuse me.
I'm "giving up" because I don't want to spend the rest of my life with someone? I'm "too young" to make this kind of life altering decision? I make life altering decisions every single day. I'm not "giving up", I'm deciding that I'm better than losing my independence and happiness to be with someone. I'll find someone? I'M NOT LOOKING FOR ANYONE!
I much prefer to live alone, pay my own bills, and support myself. As to having children? That's going happen when I can financially and emotionally support another living human being that will be dependent on me for at least 18 years of its life. I don't need a significant other to have or raise a baby. I can do that on my own when I'm good a ready to.
Me choosing to be single for the rest of my life more than most likely doesn't mean I'm giving up, or that I'm too cynical. I just don't want to be with anyone. I would much rather you ALL support my decision instead of telling me that I'll find someone. That makes me mad and makes me think that you think too less of me to be able to live my life alone and independently.
Okay, I'm off my soapbox I think. I hope everyone has a good Valentine's Day, even though I don't really think this should be a holiday. Love everyone everyday, not just one day a year.
Monday, February 13, 2012
Society, we have a srs problem.
I'm currently blogging this from my iPhone so I'll upload links and stuff when I'm near my computer.
Anyway, today I stumbled upon a tumblr post stating they don't know which is sadder, people who don't know who Paul McCartney is or women stating they would let Chris Brown beat them. That's kind of a no brained to me. Those who don't know who Sir McCartney is clearly don't know how to use google, but those ladies are serious just because Chris Brown is "sexy, attractive, etc, etc".
This is a HUGE problem ladies. You have more self worth than to let some nasty ass woman beater to beat the shit out of you. Excuse the somewhat harsh language, but he shouldn't even have a career in my opinion. After what he did to Rihanna he should have been shunned from music indefinitely. We are sending our girls the wrong message. We're telling everyone "hey, it's okay to beat the shit out of your girlfriend. You'll still have a career!", that's disgusting.
Reading all those tweets about how these ladies would let Chris Brown beat them is just something I can't wrap my brain around. Hitting another human being, especially a woman, is NEVER okay. NEVER. I don't care what your personal feelings are towards Rihanna saying that, god forbid, "she deserved it", makes you just as guilty as Chris Brown was in hitting her.
There's never an acceptable to reason to lay a hand on a lady. NEVER EVER. There's never a reason to victim blame either. Who are you to say that someone deserved to get beat up? Woman are several victims of abuse everyday, whether it be by their husbands, boyfriends, fathers, mothers, or just someone they trust there's no reason for this. Some of these ladies are too afraid to leave the abusive situation, which can lead to them being murdered. Is that okay? No.
Society we need to wake up and treat our women better. We need to wake up and see what is happening to them and what potentially could happen. We have to know the signs of an abusive relationship and we need to be their strength to get them out of that relationship. They can't do this alone. We also need to teach our girls that it's never okay for someone to lay a hand on you. It's never okay for them to make you believe that you deserve it.
I'm stepping off my soap box for a bit but I'm still REALLY upset about this Chris Brown thing. Seriously. It's time to wake up everyone.
Anyway, today I stumbled upon a tumblr post stating they don't know which is sadder, people who don't know who Paul McCartney is or women stating they would let Chris Brown beat them. That's kind of a no brained to me. Those who don't know who Sir McCartney is clearly don't know how to use google, but those ladies are serious just because Chris Brown is "sexy, attractive, etc, etc".
This is a HUGE problem ladies. You have more self worth than to let some nasty ass woman beater to beat the shit out of you. Excuse the somewhat harsh language, but he shouldn't even have a career in my opinion. After what he did to Rihanna he should have been shunned from music indefinitely. We are sending our girls the wrong message. We're telling everyone "hey, it's okay to beat the shit out of your girlfriend. You'll still have a career!", that's disgusting.
Reading all those tweets about how these ladies would let Chris Brown beat them is just something I can't wrap my brain around. Hitting another human being, especially a woman, is NEVER okay. NEVER. I don't care what your personal feelings are towards Rihanna saying that, god forbid, "she deserved it", makes you just as guilty as Chris Brown was in hitting her.
There's never an acceptable to reason to lay a hand on a lady. NEVER EVER. There's never a reason to victim blame either. Who are you to say that someone deserved to get beat up? Woman are several victims of abuse everyday, whether it be by their husbands, boyfriends, fathers, mothers, or just someone they trust there's no reason for this. Some of these ladies are too afraid to leave the abusive situation, which can lead to them being murdered. Is that okay? No.
Society we need to wake up and treat our women better. We need to wake up and see what is happening to them and what potentially could happen. We have to know the signs of an abusive relationship and we need to be their strength to get them out of that relationship. They can't do this alone. We also need to teach our girls that it's never okay for someone to lay a hand on you. It's never okay for them to make you believe that you deserve it.
I'm stepping off my soap box for a bit but I'm still REALLY upset about this Chris Brown thing. Seriously. It's time to wake up everyone.
Friday, February 10, 2012
A Little Bit About Me, Etc, Etc
First off, if you haven't gathered yet, I'm a vegan who lives in Texas. Whoa. I know. It's a little weird for me too, you know, being surrounded by barbecue and all. From there I guess what you really need to know is I'm a 21 year old, psychology undergrad in Denton.
I'm going to use this blog as a chance to vent, make shit up, and probably just put off my course work- which is very intensive this semester I might add- so just kind of bear with me. My grammar won't be perfect, but whatever, my blog my rules right?
All that said I suppose I should tell everyone why I'm vegan, or when I became vegan? I don't know ha.
To start, I've been a vegetarian for the past, mmmm... 9 months I think? During that time I met a boy, fell in love, and got dumped. I won't go into details because I'm not upset anymore and I kind of see him as a best friend than anything else I suppose. Anyway, the night we broke up I couldn't sleep so I just made coffee and decided to stay up all night and make good use of my iTunes gift cards I received for Christmas (thank you Aunt Judy and Rachel!) and I bought a vegan book. I bought "Vegan Freak..." by Bob and Jenna Torres and I must say it has opened my eyes A LOT.
I was eating cheese during my vegetarianism but once I learned what is in it and what makes us like it so much, I knew I had to cut it out. Seriously, that shits gross. Anyway, I'm not here to lecture anyone and be all "you NEED to be vegan, blah, blah, blah" because frankly, it's disrespectful and I wouldn't want you doing that to me.
That being said I have been crackcheese free since January 21, and I honestly, couldn't be happier. I'm proud of myself for coming this far and as much as I would love everyone to stop eating meat, etc, it's really not my place to make anyone do anything.
Of course, I'm here to talk if you have any random questions to ask about said veganism, what it's like living in Texas, you know, just anything.
Til next time. xx
I'm going to use this blog as a chance to vent, make shit up, and probably just put off my course work- which is very intensive this semester I might add- so just kind of bear with me. My grammar won't be perfect, but whatever, my blog my rules right?
All that said I suppose I should tell everyone why I'm vegan, or when I became vegan? I don't know ha.
To start, I've been a vegetarian for the past, mmmm... 9 months I think? During that time I met a boy, fell in love, and got dumped. I won't go into details because I'm not upset anymore and I kind of see him as a best friend than anything else I suppose. Anyway, the night we broke up I couldn't sleep so I just made coffee and decided to stay up all night and make good use of my iTunes gift cards I received for Christmas (thank you Aunt Judy and Rachel!) and I bought a vegan book. I bought "Vegan Freak..." by Bob and Jenna Torres and I must say it has opened my eyes A LOT.
I was eating cheese during my vegetarianism but once I learned what is in it and what makes us like it so much, I knew I had to cut it out. Seriously, that shits gross. Anyway, I'm not here to lecture anyone and be all "you NEED to be vegan, blah, blah, blah" because frankly, it's disrespectful and I wouldn't want you doing that to me.
That being said I have been crackcheese free since January 21, and I honestly, couldn't be happier. I'm proud of myself for coming this far and as much as I would love everyone to stop eating meat, etc, it's really not my place to make anyone do anything.
Of course, I'm here to talk if you have any random questions to ask about said veganism, what it's like living in Texas, you know, just anything.
Til next time. xx
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